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Assertiveness : 'The ability to communicate our thoughts, feelings and ideas, both positive and negative, in an open and honest way which does not abuse our rights or the rights of others

1. Passive Behaviour

• The non-assertive person:
• Is reluctant to express own opinions, and particularly, feelings
• Often feels used by others
• Keeps quiet when others take advantage
• Refrains from complaining when services or products are not up to standard
• Finds it difficult to refuse the requests of others for time or resources
• Acquiesces in the views and desires of the majority even though these conflict with personal wishes
• Frequently makes compromises in the interests of harmony
• Is unwilling to inconvenience people for the things he or she wants
• Is submissive in the presence of aggressive behaviour
• Prefers to keep own views private

 2. Aggressive Behaviour

• The aggressive person:
• Frequently argues with others
• Frequently gets angry and thinks that others need to be put in their place
• Has no difficulty in complaining when receiving poor quality products or services
• Usually gets own way in situations
• Expects others to accommodate own time schedules
• Has strong views on many subjects and has no difficulty in expressing them
• Easily and frequently finds fault with others
• Continually works to personal agendas at the expense of others
• Rarely feels aware of the needs or feelings of others
• Competes with others and is angry if not successful

3.  Assertive Behaviour

The assertive person:

• Is able to express desires and feelings to others
• Is able to converse and work well with people at all levels
• Is able to appreciate the views of others and accept any that appear more reasonable than their own
• Is able to disagree with someone yet retain their friendship and respect
• Is aware of the needs and desires of others
• Is able to make concessions to others without feelings of inadequacy
• Is able to express a concern or a need with minimum embarrassment to both parties
• Is able to control feelings and emotions even in difficult or emotionally charged situations
• Is able to refuse a request without feeling guilty or obliged
• Is able to ask for what he or she wants and can insist on legal entitlements without becoming emotional

Behavior Types Assertiveness passive behavior Aggressive behavior Emotions Personal Effectiveness